5 reasons compromise is a word that is dirty relationship negotiations

3 February 2011 by Tammy Lenski

We tell my clients and grad pupils that compromise, or settlement by concession, is really a dirty term in relationship negotiations. a fast tale to illustrate:

The scene: a property show that is decorating tv. The figures: Wife, spouse, interior decorator. The setting: Couple’s living room with a large, blank, newly painted wall surface behind the stunning brand new couch that is sectional.

The scenario: The couple is attempting to pick art for the wall surface. The spouse likes the traditional-looking oil artwork, the spouse likes the modern wall surface sculpture.

The inner decorator proposes a contemporary oil artwork, saying, “It’s the right compromise!” Wife and husband each nod in contract, however their faces state all of it: whenever decorator departs and also the digital cameras are loaded up, that painting is going to be gone faster than a bee-stung stallion.

It’s maybe not that compromise doesn’t have it is destination in relationships (negotiating, for example, fast quality of generally speaking unimportant day-to-day material). It’s that for way too many partners, co-workers, and business partners compromise is much like having a pony that is one-trick the paddock. Elegant, efficient, effective problem-solving arises from having more ponies to select from.

The 5 reasons compromise is just a dirty term

  1. You wind up with watered-down solutions. A little unhappy like the couple in my story, you may well end up with a solution or decision that doesn’t make anybody happy and may actually make everyone. That’s a great option for the small day-to-day items that don’t ultimately matter in your lifetime, but an unhealthy tradeoff whenever negotiating things that matter.
  2. It limits possibility. And talking about tradeoffs: whenever compromise is the approach that is primary to quality, you limit possibility considerably. That’s since when you’re stuck in concession-making mode, you neglect to see the options that other problem-solving approaches would illuminate. Continue reading